Well, things are moving a bit faster than expected although I suppose that’s not a bad thing. We had a match with a girl on 3nder (feels so weird this whole meeting people via technology thing!) and have been corresponding with her ever since (so one day exactly :)). We’ve set up a meeting (dinner and drinks) for week after next Saturday and are busy trying to learn the ropes of flirting via text message.
God, it’s hard! You don’t want to sound cheesy or be too forward, or too sleazy but then not boring either, can’t be too eager or too distant. It’s a wordy landmine and my partner and me both have a tendency to overthink things so each message becomes a minor mission in and of itself. We check each other’s messages and say things like ‘you haven’t asked her anything, that’s just statements’ or ‘that sounds too friend-like’. It took me over half an hour to write one message, I’m not even kidding.
My partner mentioned to me that he feels out of practice at “flirting with intent”. I had to think about that one. I see what he’s saying but I don’t know that there’s too much difference. Generally, you would just stop flirting or put the kybosh on it when things start getting more serious. Both people generally know what the deal is and it’s just up to you to stop it if you know it can’t go any further. Except now, you don’t have to stop it. You just have to pick when to make your move.
Now for me, that’s the part I’m unsure of. When I was single, I had no problem being the aggressor in the flirting game, guy or girl. I was happy to put myself out there, make the first move. I was well practiced in the art of seduction and good game chat. Now… maybe not so much. Or maybe it’s more that I feel like I’m out of practice. I’ve been so cued into the signal of just one person that I don’t know if I’ll be able to read another person’s signals correctly.
And that’s the worrying thing. That and will I be nervous at dinner. From her photos, she looks very pretty. She’s been with guys and girls before and one couple. She said she’s met with other couples before but hasn’t hit it off. What if she doesn’t find us charming? We’re very fun but fun doesn’t necessarily translate to fuckable. What if it’s weird and awkward? How do you get out of that without hurting people’s feelings?
I suppose we’ll just have to see.
Thank you, Wallpapersinhq, for my pretty train image.