Porn, self-pleasure and fantasising during sex

In one of our texting sessions, Eve mentioned that she predominantly watches lesbian and threesome (MFF) porn. I had to admit that I’d never really gotten into it. My porn taste runs to the more hardcore but, when she said it, I wondered if it was just because I found the more traditional lesbian/threesome porn quite unrealistic. She recommended a site and I found myself with a little bit of time on my hands yesterday so I checked it out.

Nubile Films. Now, by no means do I think it’s entirely realistic but it is a bit more female centric than the standard porn stuff. I watched a lot of videos yesterday and, in all the clips I saw, there was only one set of fake boobs, which is rare for mainstream porn, I think. Granted, Nubile are going for that whole young/teenage thing so fake boobs don’t really fit into their model but still it was refreshing (n.b. I’m not against fake boobs, I just like variety, which I find there is very little of in mainstream porn). As an added bonus, the guys were also good looking and didn’t treat the girls like pieces of meat.

There was kissing (gasp!) and foreplay and, yes, even though women were still cum on, it did seem a tad bit more tasteful and gentle than the usual use-and-abuse sex I’m used to watching (although maybe this says more about me than anything else). In one clip, the girls were on top of one another in a 69 position with the guy fucking the girl on top from behind, while she licked the girl on bottom’s pussy. After the guy came inside the girl on top, the girl on bottom swallowed his cum. Normally, I wouldn’t be into that but, for some reason, I found it really hot. Maybe because the scene had been so gentle and well shot and the girls looked like they were into it. I don’t know – perhaps I was sucked into the big porn machine. Oh well.

After watching all these clips, I texted my partner so he could come home and fuck me but, as luck would have it, he was tired. He did come home and he did bring ice cream but, sadly, there was no sex to be had. I ended up playing with myself, which at the end of the day, isn’t a bad situation, really.

I’ve played with myself from a very young age. I remember I used to position myself under the tap in the bath tub and let the water run down onto my clit. I didn’t know what I was doing but I knew it felt good. Sadly, my mum caught me. I must have been somewhere between 5 and 7 years old. I got in trouble and didn’t do it again until I figured out that a water jet in a pool would achieve the same result (around the age of 10 or so). In my mid-teens, we had a similar bath tub/tap set up and then I discovered that my hands could do the job just as well. I reckon I must have done it damn near everyday (sometimes more than once) for most of my teens and early twenties.

Sometimes I wonder if it’s affected my ability to come with an actual living human being. I know if I were to play with myself now, I’d struggle to come with my partner if he were to fuck me in the next 24 hours. I don’t know if it’s that I’m desensitised or that I use up all my ‘fantasising material’ and need time to accumulate more. Is it normal that I have to fantasise during sex?

I know with guys, the sensation of sex is often enough for them but, for me, I usually need clitoral stimulation and fantasising. I told my partner this and he was quite surprised, perhaps even a little hurt. But it’s not that I’m necessarily thinking about someone else (it’s usually him and another woman) but I do need to be thinking about something. Getting caught up in the moment isn’t a strategy that result in orgasms for me.

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3 thoughts on “Porn, self-pleasure and fantasising during sex

    1. Hmmm… I would say 90% of the time I fantasise about my partner fucking someone else, either with me watching or just him and the girl. Works damn near every time. Sometimes it’s me and him fucking somewhere public or him dominating me, being forceful/aggressive/rough. I’d say he’d be aware of everything except maybe the more rough stuff. Although I did write about a quite dominant fantasy I had the other day and sent him the link and he was definitely turned on by it. So maybe I have some of that to look forward to in real life… 🙂

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