Well, we met Andy last night. I was very nervous. I spent a lot of time walking around the house sighing while trying to get ready. Going on a date is frightening stuff! I was pretty close to freaking out but, thankfully, J was calm and he held my hand on the drive over (he was like my very own Robin Williams genie).
Dinner was lovely. She was nervous too. I reckon it was much easier for her as we at least had each other. It must have been much more nerve-wracking for her, poor girl. I think we did a decent job of putting her at ease and keeping the conversation flowing (J’s very good at that). Normally, I would have a glass of wine to take the edge off but she doesn’t drink and we’re doing Dry July (starting a bit early so we can finish in time for a music festival at the end of the month). So, there was no liquid courage to be had. Oh well, the dinner was nice but… not really much chemistry.
Both J and me prefer confident women. Yes, we were all nervous but she did come across as the more shy, quiet type. Still, I can sometimes be that way when I first meet people so I want to give her the benefit of the doubt but, even then, I didn’t really feel a sexual attraction, which as much as I hate to admit it, is important. I know J would prefer a more “girly” girl for want of a better word. It’s hard. We so wanted it to work (and I suppose it still could) but I just don’t know if it will be the right fit. We are SO different and, while I feel we might be interested in a lot of the stuff she does, I just don’t feel she would get into a lot of our interests (music festivals, bar hopping, the occasional big night on the town, etc., not that that’s all we do).
Do you think common interests are important in a triad? Or can you have one person who isn’t into what the rest are into? I just feel like, with our third person coming into an established relationship, it’s important for them to feel included and, if their lifestyle is too different, it would be easy for them to feel excluded. Still, I suppose the lack of sexual attraction is the main issue here.