I fear I may have a problem. I’ve known for a long time now that masturbation helps you fall asleep but it wasn’t until the last few weeks or maybe months that I’ve really started applying it with any kind of dedication. I’d say I do it five or six nights out of seven and those missing nights are probably just because I fell asleep mid-play.
It’s not that I think masturbation is wrong. Far from it. My issue is that, when I play with myself too frequently (I can’t believe I’m admitting there even is a ‘too frequent’ level), I can’t come during sex if it happens within say a 12hr window afterwards. I use up all my spank bank material on my own solo pleasure mission and have nothing left when it comes time to play with others. And I need my spank bank material. I need to fantasise during sex. I don’t know why, I just do. There have been very few occasions when I’ve managed to come without fantasising about something.
So. Do I deny myself my nightly pleasures or save myself for those times when Jared is around to pleasure me? Which is usually only once a week at this stage because he’s super busy with work. You know what? Don’t even answer that question. I know I wouldn’t be capable of holding off that long regardless of the consequences. Hmmmm… seems like I’m in quite the pickle.
Fuck it, I’m just going to roll on. You can’t hold back on definite orgasms in the hopes of maybe orgasms (maybe in the sense that I don’t know when they’ll happen, not that Jared can’t make them happen). Live for the moment, I say. Carpe the fucking orgasm!